tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25348459653966055292011-04-21T16:09:04.308-07:00Cosmo Heartbear, PhDCosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.comBlogger101100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-75586948671528464712009-04-30T21:31:00.000-07:002009-04-30T21:46:58.326-07:00

Last week I was feeling terrible that I had failed, or worse, that I was a failure. I was having a hard time forgiving myself. I was saying, “You did the best you could, it was a hard situation, don’t beat yourself up.” I was feeling foolish for having gone ahead with a plan that seemed like a good idea at the time (a great idea, in fact), and it fell far short of the mark, costing me money,

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-17517953763578942252008-06-07T10:36:00.000-07:002008-06-07T10:37:37.717-07:00

In every moment you make a decision that is the best one you can come up with, given all of the information you have, all of your wisdom, all of your love and joy, and all of your pain. It may not work out the way you intended, or expected, or hoped for, and you may wish you had made a “better” decision, or you may think you “should” have made a different choice. When you do that, you diminish

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-39667547601960360912008-05-02T21:44:00.000-07:002008-05-03T08:52:00.329-07:00

Have you ever stopped and sat with yourself when the dark side of the moon comes up?Have you ever laughed into the abyss?Have you ever died, shattering into a thousand pieces, only to find yourself alive, more than you had ever thought possible?Have you ever stood at the top of the mountain and cried out "Fuck you!"?Have you ever stood at the top of the mountain and said "Yes!"?Have you ever

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-17539753036063863422008-04-20T18:11:00.001-07:002008-04-20T23:40:14.524-07:00

I walked out of my house today. At the bottom of the stairs on the grey cement sidewalk lay a butterfly. The butter yellow of its Monarch wings was hard to miss. It wasn’t moving, just sitting there, its wings splayed. I approached the butterfly slowly. At this distance I could see all the details of its wings: yellow panes of stained glass, outlined in black, with a row of vibrant blue dots at

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-4249731557881130622008-04-08T14:27:00.000-07:002008-04-08T14:29:26.851-07:00

Have you ever had a relationship end, and the pain of it persists and is pervasive? It can be both excruciating and exhausting. Or have you managed to move on, and then you get an email from them, and it sends you into a tail spin?What is in the way of moving on? What keeps that wound from closing?The answer can be quite simple: The pain is how you continue a relationship with them. In every

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-80019816862701963912008-03-25T00:02:00.000-07:002008-03-25T00:03:43.179-07:00

Has anyone ever said to you, “You have to earn my respect”? I know when I have heard it it didn’t feel very good. Why not? There is an underlying message. It means that I start out from a place of no respect. It means that I don’t respect you until you prove yourself worthy of my respect. It means I am not worthy. And that doesn’t feel very good.It further means that there are levels of respect.

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-40212909279707426482008-02-14T08:41:00.000-08:002008-02-14T08:44:00.429-08:00

It was a few days before my back surgery. I could stand for maybe 30 seconds before the pain hit. Maybe a minute. It would start in my hip and spread down through my thigh, down my calf, and into my foot. But it was breakfast time, and I was home alone, and I was hungry.I made it to the kitchen. I really wanted some eggs. Scrambled would be fast, I thought. Standing at the stove, I can feel time

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-90417607499536923282007-11-13T23:03:00.000-08:002007-11-14T13:45:07.664-08:00

And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile, with a beautiful wife, and a beautiful house, and you may ask yourself, “How did I get here?”. -The Talking HeadsWe tend to live by this rule: Get, Do, Be. First we decide what we want to get. Then we figure out what to do to get it. Then after the doing

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-64762232784874337092007-10-29T22:54:00.001-07:002007-10-29T23:20:44.613-07:00

It has been a long road to this moment, captured by my photographer friend Marcy Mendelson. Finally, I can stop running: I am enough. Finally, I know that I matter. And when I completely matter, nothing matters---when I know the love that I am, nothing is at risk anymore. I have what I need. What a wonderful sense of freedom! There is nothing to do. Just sit and breathe and enjoy the sun and the

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2534845965396605529.post-8296955688777829152007-10-29T22:28:00.000-07:002007-10-29T22:41:15.775-07:00

The root of all of our pain is not our attachments. Our attachments are a symptom of the root of our pain. The root of our pain is not knowing that we are love. When we don’t love ourselves, we attach ourselves to entities to create an illusion of being love. When we do not know that we are love, we ask everything around us to tell us that we are love. And then we have attached our hearts and our

Cosmo Heartbearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00648386048854654991noreply@blogger.com2